Saturday, May 31, 2008

Heark! A Big Black Penis is Floating in the Sky!

It's big, it's puffy, it's poking into places it shouldn't be... it's a BOOM MIC! Yesterday, Alex dragged me to Sex and the City and I got so fed up with Movies Imperial. Dammit, learn how to FRAME. They had the movie either on the wrong aspect ratio or too low in the projector. It was very annoying to see boom mics floating above the actor's heads. Very unprofessional. AND they had to stop the movie at the second reel for some reason. They had to do it at every showing, apparently, since the girl in the booth WHO IS NOT A PROJECTIONIST was waiting for it to happen and because our movie didn't start until 10:20 when it should have started at 9:45 (it got stopped at every showing which pushed back the times). They do not take care of their film. The sound was reeling and loopy and it was completely distracting. Once, the film even slipped to halfway down the screen. The movie was good actually, but I couldn't help but feel disconnected 50% of the time. Mind you, this was only the FOURTH showing and the film was already botched.

This is not the first time I've complained at this theater. They blew out their speakers in one theater and I had to watch Hairspray with horrible sound, they didn't frame Sweeney Todd right and showed half the movie. The first time Alex complained, they just moved it up and showed the OTHER half of the movie. For anther movie I can't remember, they had it set on the wrong size and the movie was squeezed to TV ratio. Another time, their air conditioners were broken so they set up a fan in the theater. It was really hot AND I couldn't hear the movie over the fan. Once, they weren't playing the sound to a movie. Movies Imperial SUCKS. They need to hire a real, licensed projectionist. Their service is going to suck until they do.


On a good note, BROOKYLN, ALISHA, COURTNEY and some other chick WERE THERE! I love them. They are my boos. Well, that's all I wanted to say. Thanks to Brooklyn for blog inspiration. Go see SATC at CINEMARK. :D

-Big D

Friday, May 23, 2008

Senior Reflection

This is an essay I just wrote for Mr. Whitehead. I thought it would interest y'all.

Dylan Hale
5/23/08
P.1

Senior Year Reflection
I am not over sixty-five years of age. I do not qualify for extremely reduced movie prices. I am not anyone’s authority but my own. I am not any of these things. But I am a senior. Senior. Just what does that mean? Way too much is what it means. It’s applying to colleges, making ridiculously hard choices, fighting tough battles, sweet benefits, and maybe even risking life. That’s what it was for me. I fought my way through this year and slept less and less as the year progressed. I figured I would sleep more because I’d have a free period. Alas, no. The assignment for this paper was to write first on this class, second on your entire year, and lastly if needed for space, your future plans. Well, for the sake of writing a compelling essay, I’m going to mix up the order a bit. I need to start with the beginning of the year.

It was boring… tiresome, even. The summer felt as if it had lasted a week. I was back at the lovely Brawley Union High School campus already. I was a little excited for work experience, though. I was going to work with the deputy district attorney’s office in the County Administration building. I soon found out that “working” with them meant sitting and watching arraignments with Judge Donnelly. I love Donnelly. He’s the one of the coolest judges on the bench in this county. But I couldn’t get over how he’d start every morning with addressing the criminals like so: “Good morning everyone. On behalf of the Brawley courts, I’d like to welcome you here today. When I call your name, please step forward and I will read what you have been charged with and give you your options…” blah blah blah, he’d go on for fifteen minutes about consulting with the Public Defender, a grotesque greasy man who never failed at being late. Needless to say, work experience was not about to rescue my year. It was all thanks to the clerk in that office who had just had a heart attack the week before school started and died. They had filing issues and staff problems and it was not the best environment. The rest of my classes were ho hum. Yes, including Economics. I’m sorry, but I didn’t expect for Econ to be so… what is the correct euphemism… not liking to my academic tastes. Sure I liked our stock market project, but the money I made was fake in the end. It wasn’t horrible until I found out I was going to get a ‘C’.

Well, life went on until one day, I crashed my car. You knew this was coming. How could I write an essay on my senior year without dragging in my Dippy Duck salvation? Yes, I crashed. I don’t remember the crash. I remember getting onto Austin Road, wearing my UCLA sweatshirt and new nice jeans from Buckle, a horribly overpriced store that I have no business in but my cousin Carson dragged me into. And the next thing I remember is being strapped down on a board, my head pounding, I think on the side of the road. I remember hearing “you’ve been in a car accident” and me saying, “I know”. But then I remember being at UCSD Medical Center in San Diego with an uncomfortable brace around my neck that was making me panic a bit. I remember telling the nurse I applied here when he told me where I was. Jim was his name. I remember that for some ridiculous reason. And then I tried to relax and was finally freed from the brace and was wheeled to a room with some guy from the army. By then it was Friday sometime, though I don’t remember when. Everything in my memory is blurred and dark. I woke up and ate my liquid food which tasted like nectar and ambrosia and began my recovery. Thank God I didn’t have a mirror in my room. I now know that I looked despicable. The next day I had tons of visitors who wore me out and then I went home Sunday. I can’t believe how quickly I was out of there. It took a few days for the morphine in my system to fade and there’s still a bump on my left wrist where my gynormous IV was put in.

All of this gets me to what I learned from this class. Lord knows it wasn’t the material. Econ I forgot about and Government has been one big recap. I missed one week of school. Just one week. I forced myself back for the start of the Mock Trial season. I couldn’t write at all. I was going to trials high on vicodin with my head leaking gooey fluid. And I was winning them, too. But I wasn’t writing in school. I hadn’t talked to any of my teachers because Miss Hardy had told my parents everything would be taken care of and she’d tell all of my teachers about my injuries, and also because it was obvious to me. But that was stupid of me. That is what I learned. I knew already not to trust my real counselor, but I learned from you, Mr. Whitehead that I should always check on my own to make sure something has been done. I’ll never forget my searing rage when I couldn’t turn in my missing assignments, trying hard not to break out into a screaming fit. I was livid. Of course I didn’t tell you how I felt and you probably didn’t know exactly how mad I was because I’m an actor and that’s what we people do. But now, thank you, thank you, thank you. I have a B in your class. I went from the lowest D I could have to a B because I had to challenge myself to get points. I’m beating my last semester grade. If it wasn’t for the accident, who knows what I would have ended up with. I would have completely gotten sick of your class. I would have continued blaming my test scores on your “insane” procedures. I was forced to take responsibility and stab my usual mid-year feeling of, “I cared too much before to give a darn now.” That’s been the story of my life up until I saw what I was capable of; because getting a B from where I was re-established my faith in myself.

Yeah, I’ve had a lot of accomplishments so far. I got into great schools, I chose UC Santa Barbara, I’ll be studying theater on the beach in three months. I’ve talked with Supreme Court Justices, I’ve shaken the Terminator’s hand, I’ve hugged stage stars, I’ve argued cases before Los Angeles Superior Court Judges, I’ve spoken at a Torrey Pines High School board meeting, I’ve sung, danced, acted my face off this year. But most importantly, I rediscovered myself. This is not standard high school BS. I may be poor, I may be black, I may be a woman and I may even be ugly. But I’s here. By God, I’s here. <-- That’s from The Color Purple, in case you didn’t know.


What'd ya think?

-Big D

Monday, May 19, 2008

San Diego went KABOOM!

So, we had been sitting in our room at UCSD Medical Center, waiting for Dr. Schwartz to come and quickly tell me about my arm, and we hear over the intercom, "Attention Employees, there is a code triage, we have multiple incoming mass trauma, this is not a drill. There was an explosion downtown." Well, we were like, c'mon, Schwartzy, you can do it! Just get us done. An intern came in and said, "Okay, can I get you guys started before my attending comes in?" "Sure." "Well,-" and then the Drill Sergeant nurse came in and said, "You folks are going to have to reschedule, we're canceling all appointments." "But we came from two hours away." "I'm sorry, we need to evacuate you." It was like, Grey's Anatomy shit, yo! And ortho is right next to the emergency entrance, so it was pretty intense. It turns out a Hilton hotel under construction and unopened had a gas leak and it had blown away four of the floors. It ended up being only 13 injuries, which is fairly substantial I guess, but apparently Schwartz wasn't needed for much in trauma because she called our house to apologize for the inconvenience just an hour later. Only thing is... we were still in SD having a late lunch. Irony. A cosmic joke on humans.

Oh well, I'll call her tomorrow and ask what's up with my humerus. In other news, I'm pretty sure the show is going to be the 4-5 of June, which is a Thursday-Friday. It should be a good one, so come see it if you can! Five bucks. What else??? I got a scholarship from the Brawley Elementary Teacher's Association!!! Yay. The awards ceremony for scholarships is next Wednesday, so hopefully I'll get some more! Seriously not much else is up. I'm filled with shrimp and clam chowder from Anthony's, heaven with scales, and I feel pretty good. I'm gonna go watch some TV now I think. Shoutout to Brooklyn Wagner!!! And, as always, Caitybaby.

-Big D

Friday, May 9, 2008

Holy Moly and Ah Ah Ah!

Weird title, eh? Well, HOLY MOLY, my show is NEXT WEEK! 6 DAYS! I'm praying that we will be ready. Alex, Alanna, and I are supposed to meet up tomorrow to go over EVERYTHING just to get it right before we start honing in on tech. We SHOULD have been doing tech all this week, but a combination of bad scheduling, no chaperoning, a vicious janitor who takes his job way too seriously, and a plethora of potential stage crew peeps in time consuming night classes made that impossible. So, Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday we'll be running tech and I'll be hoping that it looks good. My plan: Monday, focus on Act 1. Tuesday, focus on Act 2. Wednesday, run both. Thursday at 11:15 a.m. we go on!!! Holy moly. Please God, let my show be okay. I'm worried because Alex likes to sleep until 4 on Saturdays and with all the tension between the three of us, oy...

Ah, ah, ah! I got into the Freshman Summer Start Program at UCSB and I'm picking out my classes. It's very unnerving. I'm like, yikes over here. It's so HARD to schedule college classes. Especially when there's only limited ones since there'll be only 376 students there. Ah!

Other than those two pieces of news, I have some sad stuff. John Altieri, my Idyllwild Arts Summer Camp theatre teacher/director passed away Sunday due to complications from pneumonia. It's very sad. He was only 38 and a health nut. So many people will miss him.

Not much else to report. I'm so scared for all this stuff that's coming up!!! Especially the show!!! Oh my God!!! Yikes! Please let this show be a good one. And please let Alanna and Alex not be menstrual for this next week. Please God.

-Big D

Monday, May 5, 2008

Life Today...

Life today. So, Whitehead is cool. I wrote O Julie and O Jasmine and When Katherine Looks Upon Me (poems). They were well received. AND, Alex is late again. No news there. She had to go to the office. Stupid girl. Ai yi yi.

Tutorial we made fun of the counselors in Palmer. Lol, Mr. Felix tried to sound all professional but he said, “You gotta cross your I’s and… oh wait. Five seconds later, cue laughter from all the kids. Then Ms. Hardy goes all crazy like, “You need to listen to Mr. Felix! He meant to say Cross your T’s and dot your I’s. Listen to the message!” And I’m like, okay, I’ll listen and all, but when he doesn’t make any sense, the message is like… hacking the DaVinci Code or something. I mean, letters make words. Words make thoughts and sentences. But when you fiddle fuck around with them, it’s just gibberish. THEN they HAD to give Mrs. Mungia the microphone. BTW, they didn’t even need the mic. And it was turned up too loud because they couldn’t hear themselves, which further proves their stupidity because they would be able to hear themselves if they STOOD ON THE STAGE. But the light blinded their eyes a little. Puny pansies! Suck it up, I say! And as a result of that pansy-ness, the mic squeaked about a hundred times when they would walk in front of the speaker or talk too loud. Another verbal highlight was Mrs. Mungia saying, “I can’t reiterate what Mr. Felix just said about being dumb. You guys can’t be dumb.” Not gonna bother explaining the frustration on that one. Also, she brought up her STOOOOOPID tissue crap again. She thinks she’s SO smart when she thinks up this shit. I mean, God. “I don’t wanna have to go to Costco and buy tissues so I can cry with you but I will. I will support you. But I’d rather support you on Warne Field.” Holy Christ, did I have fun with that one.

Anyway, then came Graphic Design and I’ve noticed that EVERY CLASS in there lately has resulted in me and Alanna and Alex getting into some sort of argument. Most of the time it’s Alex overreacting to everything as usual and going all crazy for no reason. I get really sad when we fight, but I can’t help just getting so annoyed with her sometimes. I’m not even a fighter. I run away from conflict nine times out of ten. But when I say any little thing she starts her pointless and unsupported attacking! I know it’s coming when I hear her practically scream, “WELL, blabbity blabbity blah insert weak argument here.” Then she finishes up with how it hurts her feelings. The other day I told her she was a very paranoid person the way she’s always, “Oh no, we won’t be able to sit next to Alanna and Chistoso at prom unless we buy our tickets NOW!” It doesn’t matter that she’s broke like Fergie and so am I. And she got so pissed when I told her I wasn’t going to grad night. Come ON. GET OVER YOURSELF YOU SPOILED BRAT. Please. It’s for your own good. Stop telling me how I hurt your feelings all the time. I can just hear her argument. “WELL…” Oy. And BUHS just called with their annoying new phone recordings. They got way too excited when they got that program. I love when they’re distorted. “This is a ca-ca-ca-call from Bra-a-awley Union Hi-i-i-igh…” Makes my night. So back to GD. Then, Alanna was like, “Where do you guys want to go to lunch cuz it’s Cinco De Mayo and we get an hour for lunch.” Alex and I don’t have a 5th period anyway so we were out technically. I was like, “I feel like Tacos & Beer, especially since I can afford it today.” Immediately I hear, “Uhh! You guys go to Tacos & Beer ALL THE TIME and you never go to Stockman’s with me.” I was like, holy shit, she’s gonna blow a fuse, pop a shit. Somebody fix Alanna’s circuits. I’m like, “Alanna, you only asked us once and we did go.” “Well, then come today.” “I don’t like Stockman’s that much.” “Well I HATE everything at Tacos & Beer and I don’t really like Mexican food.” I think Alex was scared shitless so she agreed. When we were walking to her car, I called my mom and was like, “Oh, you need me to go home?” And was able to get away from the PMSing freaks I call my best friends. Yeah, everything did happen, this ain’t made up. And I love them and all, but I wish Chistoso was available more. Sure I’m risking my social life posting this, but oh well. I should have gone to Hacienda with Carson and Cheyenne. Sweetie Pie, that girl.

Well I have to go pick up Austin from baseball practice. It’s Maddy’s birthday today and Saige’s was Friday. Go Saige and Maddy. Woot. And I’ll leave on a good note: LINDSAY IS GETTING MARRIED! I don’t think I’ve talked about Lindsay before, but she’s my Aunt on my dad’s side. Today’s blog is dedicated to the future Mrs. Messner, I think it is. To bad this isn’t a nicer themed blog. Congrats, grrrl! Dylan out.

-Big D

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Holla Y'all

It's been a long time! Well, I've finally found some time to update you on my crazy life. Aww, heyuh it gooooes!

Well, I'll be heading off to Santa Barbara this summer to start my COLLEGE EXPERIENCE!! Holy Bajesus! Very scary and exciting. I'm doing the Freshman Summer Stat Program, and I hope it'll put me in the swing of things up there. Not getting into UCLA was horrible at first, and then I started hearing THINGS. Yes, THINGS. I heard that there are some structural problems with UCLA's program, and also really thought about the cons, or acid list if you may, of that program. Originally I thought that BA v. BFA didn't matter. It apparently does! Lol, jk, I knew it did. But now I fully understand the two and would prefer the BFA. In short, it reduces the amount of otras courses you have to take and focuses more on your chosen aspect of the fine arts. For instance, at UCLA in the theater program, only 50% of your class time is on theatre. If I get into the BFA program at UCSB, which I will audition for at the end of my freshman year, I'll spend the majority of my time studying theatre. The drawbacks are only that the UCSB program is an acting emphasis, not con music. What this means is that I will most likely take classes from within the music major or else train on my own or with some otra person.

See how I use my Spanish skills? Oy. Well, if only that class were as simple as throwing in a few "otras" in every day conversations. I'll definitely pass, totes, but oy, it will kill me softly. However, my other classes are going dandily. I have a C in Phillips, which is GREAT! There are only two of us in there with C's and I'm one of them. He said the peeps with D's will have B's at the end of the semester, so I'm hoping for an A! And, today we took a test in Government... a big 'ole 200 pointer... I GOT 200 OUT OF 200! YEAH B-OTCH! Hwut now, mofo? Sickness max. Graphic Design is coo as well, and I just finished my movie poster, which is buh-buh-buh-brutiful. Now we're working on packaging/product design.

The OMS (one man show) is going fine. We have it all learned and we'll be off-book next week. That will hopefully go well. And it's award season!! I'm applying for scholarships like mad, writing essays, or rather, just printing the same one over and over. I have a killer resume. Cha. And now I must go. I have so much Catch-22 to read.

Laterz
-Big D

Monday, March 17, 2008

Congratulations! On behalf of the faculty and staff at the University of California, Santa Barbara, I am pleased to offer you admission to the Theater major in the College of Letters and Science for the Fall 2008 quarter. Your selection from among a pool of thousands of qualified applicants recognizes your extraordinary academic accomplishments and exceptional personal qualities.


!!!!!!

And now we hope for UCLA and Irvine!!

-Big Winner!